While working on setting up my website, I struck up a conversation with someone at the café as I wrote. I shared with him the name of my website – ‘Diary of A Depressive’. He questioned the name, wondering if it shouldn’t have a more positive title. Shouldn’t it be something that sounded more hopeful?

‘Well,’ I told him, ‘This website is my story. And, fundamentally, my story is one of hope.’

I told him to have a seat so I could explain it further, because my stories are never short. My website is called ‘Diary of a Depressive’ because I am a depressive. That is the nature of my reality. By showing that I am a depressive and can still function day-to-day in the world and even thrive, I am sharing a message of hope. We can give hope to others who are struggling by modeling that recovery and healing is possible, and that the suffering won’t go on forever.  When I share my story, I’m reminding folks that the darkness doesn’t last forever.

Ultimately, I’m also reminding myself of that. Because even from a place of healing and recovery, I recognize that the darkness will always be a part of my life in some way. And I know that there will be times when once again it is overwhelming. That’s why I spend time learning healthy ways to cope and live with it. And that’s partly why I tell my story – to codify my hope.

Maybe if I write it all down, when I find myself in a place where I don’t feel it, I can go back and read what I’ve written and remember that hope is possible for all of us. When the darkness returns to me, I can remind myself of what I’ve overcome and accomplished. That if I’ve done those things before then I can do them again.

‘Diary of a Depressive’ is my story of hope. Hope for others and importantly, hope for myself.

PS. Shoutout to Clark, who willingly sat down at my table in the café to listen and responded, ‘Is that an original line? Write that down!’